Saturday, February 24, 2007

Long Day

Well this has just been a long day. I feel like my life is just in a state of depression right now, and I really hope that it doesn't come across that way on my blog, b/c I don't want it to. There are just times that life stinks, right!!?? Well I guess today is just one of those days.

I personally have had a challenging day. I guess I'm just tired of being ignored. I deserve better, and so do my kids. So I guess the best thing is just to take myself out of the situation to the best of my ability. You can only be hurt by others if you allow them too, right? That's so much easier said than done, but I have to live by that as much as I possibly can. And so I embark on trying!

We went out to Slaton today to eat dinner with mom and dad, and by the time we got there the care center had called mom and dad to come be with Mema. She was calling for my dad. My dad does not handle this kind of thing well at all, and I can't blame him. It's his momma! We went down there with them. She is just hanging on by a thread. Her respirations are down to 8 a minute. Think about how much you breathe a minute. I bet it's way more than 8!!!

My grandmother who lives there with my granddad on another hall always checks on her. It's actually very comical. She was a nurse during WWII and then a school nurse for about 25 years. Her and my mema were really good friends. They both lived in Post and were very close. And I guess once a nurse, always a nurse. She goes and sits with Mema and then reports to the nursing staff on her condition. The best one was the other day when we got there she told my dad that mema was unresponsive. Well most people are unresponsive when they're ASLEEP. Tomorrow is my grandmother's birthday...her and my granddad are hillarious!

Anyways, so my mom is now sitting with my mema, and then my dad if he doesn't pass out from an anxiety attack, will go sit with her for a while. Jenny is out there now too. I will probably go back in the morning. It's just hard with the kids...that's not the best place for them in a time like this! I probably won't go to church tomorrow with everything going on.

We are just ready for her to go to be with Jesus!!! There is so much anticipation and waiting in a time like this, and it becomes so draining. And you wonder what is keeping them here...there must be a purpose!!! God has purpose in everything!

Well I better go...I have "American Idol" on right now, and I don't mean the show. Madi is being a rock star. She likes to perform and then she wants me to tell her, "you've made it to Hollywood" or sometimes she likes me to tell her "You're not very good, try again next year." And then of course there are all the dramatics that go along with either answer. Her expressions and imagination are out of this world! Thank the Lord I have my kids, they keep a smile on my face! :)


Blogger Lauren said...

I don't really know what to say to encourage you about your Mema. What a hard situation to be in! That's hard stuff to be dealing with right now. My prayer is that she will peacefully go to see her Father soon, so she won't be suffering anymore.

On a lighter note, Madi is too funny. What an imagination! I think it's funny that she doesn't always want to "go to Hollywood." Ah, kids :)

10:07 PM  
Blogger Paulette said...

We are all entitled to a hard day. You have alot on your plate. I am sorry you are struggling today and bad days are inevitable.
Iam still praying for you!

8:31 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Hey girl. I have not been able to read at the computer well lately so I don't get to as much as I was and I have benn out our fown. I am sorry I did not call oyou after ladies class. I totallyunderstand and Liv was sick too. I have been thinking about your family a lot lately and pryaing for your memwa. Trent's grandmother's birthday is todya too! I hope she dose not suffer much clonger. I am sad thta you have been sad. I think I might just tyr o recah you right now. Love you.

9:39 PM  
Blogger Barbie said...

{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}} Some days it really feels overwhelming doesn't it? Just know you are not alone and so many of us are lifting you in prayer. My email is always open if you need a shoulder...

10:28 PM  
Blogger jen said...

I just wanted to comment so you know that I read your story. I don't know if it's any comfort that the rumors hadn't gotten to us, but I really had no idea what you've been going through these past few weeks. (I'm a little dense at all the connections since I didn't attend LCU and we are way out of "the loop" these days.) This may take a few lines, but I'm going to share my thoughts with you.

I am so glad that you didn't quit blogging. You are an inspiration and the grace the Holy Spirit is giving you is coming through in your writing. No one expects you to be super-human through all of this, just real. You are so smart to run to Jesus! No matter what life situation we are dealing with we can learn from you on that. Thank you for your desire to be authentic and letting us be inspired by your journey.

Hang in there and hang on to Jesus!
Love you!

10:46 AM  
Blogger jen said...

I promise I'm not stalking you. I wanted you to know that I mentioned you on my blog today. I didn't mention your name, but most people that read my blog know you, too, so they may infer that it was you. If you read it and want me to remove it, please ask. I'll completely understand and not be offended. Hope you are having a good day!

3:59 PM  
Blogger Lyndy said...

You are so entitled to express your bad days and you have so much that you are dealing with.

How cute that your one grandmother checks on the other.

Know that I am praying for you and your family.

Big Hugs.

9:49 PM  
Blogger suzanne said...

I don't have a lot to say, because we probably already discussed it. I will say that you have a lot of friends that I don't know!!!! You've become quite the popular little lady :)

11:30 PM  
Blogger Barbie said...

I don't know if you have seen this is a blog about single Mom written by single helps to know you are not alone and your feelings are normal:-)

6:24 PM  

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