Forgiveness...
Okay so two posts in one day. I just had something on my mind. I have a friend who also blogs and she was talking about how she was starting the journey to let go of a hurt that she has had for a while. She has realized how she needs to forgive and move on.
I could totally identify with those feelings. Feelings of betrayl, hurt, bitterness, anger...you name it, and I know how it feels. When I read her blog, I thought, "oh that's great, I am so glad she is ready and choosing to do that. Good for her." And guess what other thought popped into my head, and I know exactly who put it there!!!! "Well I've got a long time before I have to start working on that. I need to nurse this a while longer, because well as everyone knows divorce takes a really long time to get over, so I am excused." Oh helllooo...why do I think that the rule of needing to forgive has some sort of time line? Why do I get an excuse to be angry?
Now I will be the first to admit that I am definately going through an emotional process of feelings. In divorce care they go through each of those feelings. Anger, depression, lonliness, grieving, and they definately make it a point to tell you what you will experience. And that is great, but that doesn't mean that I need to stay there. I need to deal with what I am feeling and learn to move on from that. And that is a daily process.
I don't know, my response just hit me like a lightening bolt, and I am sooo thankful that the Lord is helping me to become aware of "who" wants me to think these things. satan is tricky!
The rules apply to me just as they do to you. And you know I have to admit, that I found myself letting go of something that has really been hurting me this week, and I also experienced some wonderful blessings from God because of that choice. Me learning to forgive blesses me more, then it does that person. I am only hurting myself for holding onto the hurt. And as my friend used a thought from Oprah, I will too. Choosing to forgive doesn't change the level on which you were hurt. (paraphrased) God knows my every tear, and my every cry. And He knows how much I have been hurt. As long as He knows that's all that matters, because He is the one who will redeem me. No human can do that.
I could totally identify with those feelings. Feelings of betrayl, hurt, bitterness, anger...you name it, and I know how it feels. When I read her blog, I thought, "oh that's great, I am so glad she is ready and choosing to do that. Good for her." And guess what other thought popped into my head, and I know exactly who put it there!!!! "Well I've got a long time before I have to start working on that. I need to nurse this a while longer, because well as everyone knows divorce takes a really long time to get over, so I am excused." Oh helllooo...why do I think that the rule of needing to forgive has some sort of time line? Why do I get an excuse to be angry?
Now I will be the first to admit that I am definately going through an emotional process of feelings. In divorce care they go through each of those feelings. Anger, depression, lonliness, grieving, and they definately make it a point to tell you what you will experience. And that is great, but that doesn't mean that I need to stay there. I need to deal with what I am feeling and learn to move on from that. And that is a daily process.
I don't know, my response just hit me like a lightening bolt, and I am sooo thankful that the Lord is helping me to become aware of "who" wants me to think these things. satan is tricky!
The rules apply to me just as they do to you. And you know I have to admit, that I found myself letting go of something that has really been hurting me this week, and I also experienced some wonderful blessings from God because of that choice. Me learning to forgive blesses me more, then it does that person. I am only hurting myself for holding onto the hurt. And as my friend used a thought from Oprah, I will too. Choosing to forgive doesn't change the level on which you were hurt. (paraphrased) God knows my every tear, and my every cry. And He knows how much I have been hurt. As long as He knows that's all that matters, because He is the one who will redeem me. No human can do that.
posted by Larissa at
4:30 PM
6 Comments:
Forgiving is not the hardest for me. The hardest is praying for those that have hurt me or my family even though I've forgiven them. But maybe that means that I haven't really forgiven them, huh?
Thanks for making me think about this!
Oh wow that gave me chilly bumps. The last part. So true, Larissa. Only God can redeem us. You are so right.
I am just now catching up on your blog. I am praying for you as you make decisions, life changes and forgive. All only possible with God, so glad He is your priority. You can only be blessed by leaning on Him. I will still send up some prayers though! Hope to see you soon.
I just found your blog....an hour ago and have been reading it since. Thanks for sharing your worldly struggles while also holding fast to your faith.
I've been behind on your blog. It was good to catch up on it and hear the things you have to say. I missed our lunch this week and I thought about you a lot. I hope we can get together soon. Give me a call when you get a chance. Love you!
So glad to have a friend on this journey!
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