Sunday, January 13, 2008

Revelations...

Well I think I've found a template I like for now anyways...red is after all my favorite. I had some really cute ones that I found, but I couldn't get all my extra stuff on here like I liked. So I just went back to a color. Anyways, maybe someday when I'm rich I can actually pay someone to make it look spiffy like I want it to, but for now, this is how it will look. Let me know if you can't read it, I've had a few issues with that.

Well, well, well...it's Sunday! Children's church started back this week, thank Heavens! And oh I missed being at Monterey. I didn't realize how much I missed it, until I was there today and realized how much I enjoy church! What a blessing!!!

It's been a pretty eventful last couple of days...and I've learned so much about myself...what I need to do, what I don't need to do, and how covered I truly am by love and protection!

You know back in the summer when I decided that I truly had to take a step out and not allow fear to control my life, something really big happened. It seemed as though the minute I did that, God just opened the Heavens for me in so many ways. And I've been facing that same fear for the last couple of weeks. Well today I faced it again head on, and although nothing was solved, I felt like a massive weight was once again lifted off of me. And I guess truly it was, because God took the weight. He's carrying the burden for me, and I don't know what the outcome is...but that doesn't matter. I'm taken care of.

I confronted Nathan today about his lifestyle. I didn't really know what to expect, I knew it wasn't going to be good, but I got a reaction all right. He's contacting an attorney tomorrow and going to fight me. The thing is I'm not saying he can't see his kids, I'm saying I need to see some proof that he's in a good frame of mind to see his kids. And ya know, I asked him to prove me wrong. Show me that he's okay...he can be offended if he wants, but if you're not doing anything then it should be no big deal. So yeah, there are some worries for me. But what worry do any of us ever have that has done any of us any good??????? Not once for me. And if you've found a way to worry and it somehow solves your problem, then let me know, please. You'll be my new best friend!!!

So tonight Colt and SuzAnne took the kids for me. Until we get all this straightened out, my family has agreed to take some time for me. And as much as I hate for them to have to do that, I have to let them. My little free time I have is a necessity in order for me to recharge my batteries. And honestly this all sucks, it does. BUT, any and every time in my life when I've done the harder thing and known it was right, I was greatly rewarded by God. I know this will be the same way.

This morning at church we sang "This is My Father's World" a song I've sang a thousand times. It stood out to me today. I hope you all have a great week.

This is my Father's world. O let me ne'er forget that though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet. This is my Father's world: why should my heart be sad? The Lord is King; let the heavens ring! God reigns; let the earth be glad!

13 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was great to talk to you the other day. Just know you are covered in prayer!!

Jenny

7:59 PM  
Blogger The Binkley Family said...

Yea!!! I can read your blog.

Girl, I am so sorry that you are still having to deal with so much, but I know that God's loving arms are holding you as you take each step.

8:28 PM  
Blogger Cheri said...

you did the right thing!
isn't in awesome how certain songs or other things that someone else picks out always seem to speak to us when we need them? those are the moments that god gives me chill bumps!!!!

10:09 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

You're in my prayers! I wish I could reach through the computer and give you a hug. Love ya...

10:47 PM  
Anonymous Amanda said...

I'm glad you talked to him. Let me know if there's anything I can do. Love ya!

8:49 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

GIRL, you know my favorite is red too! LOVE IT! Also love how your facing things head on with an it is what it is attitude. You are going to be fine. Let me be one of those people to give you some time too! You know my kids would love it and I would feel honored to be able to do it! Well as soon as O is well anyway. Next week for sure!!!! I am calling you and kidnapping them!

10:37 AM  
Blogger ♥Tisha♥ said...

Love red! If you want me to go in and work on your code/background - I don't mind. Meant to tell you that earlier, just haven't gotten around to it until now.
I love that you are a "victor instead of a victim" - you RAWK. ;)
Love ya!

6:33 PM  
Blogger Cheri said...

Pulled your blog up to see if you had anything new on it and "Ice, Ice, Baby" came on!! LOVE IT!!! I remember thinking I could dance and trying to dance to this song in HS - how embarassing now!

9:16 PM  
Blogger Chrissy Cross said...

It takes a lot of guts to stand up to someone and tell them that they need to change. I am proud of you, it would be much easier just to let it go, but it is so important that you follow your conscience and do what you know is right.

10:51 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

where is your list?

2:03 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I just noticed on someone else's you put you were doing it right now, that is the only reason I was giving you a hard time. Hope your day is going good, stay outta that GODAWEFUL WIND!

2:32 PM  
Blogger suzanne said...

That's funny about the song. I wrote down the words to a song that we sung Sunday morning: "It's not about me, as if you should do things my way. You alone are God and I surrender to all your ways."
As for the weight that's been lifted off your shoulders; I think it's about 250 pounds that have been lifted :) DO NOT let them creep back on!

6:00 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

I am so proud of you! I know standing up to Nathan is not the easiest thing-but you are doing what is best for your kids, yourself, and hopefully ultimately for him!! It really is always beneficial to do what is right even when it difficult, and you will be blessed and rewarded-keep remembering that! :)

I am speaking to myself when I write this, but the scripture speaks to what you are talking about, and where we both are, so I wanted to share it with you:

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. ~Matthew 6:25-34

Many blessings on you, friend! :)

11:53 PM  

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